Feels like Lightning

I’m sitting in a garden in the middle of a small Island off of Bali and my brain cannot get out of itself. I feel like I’m half missing, and not fully enjoying this vacation as I should be. So it’s time to get all of these mumble jumbled feelings out on a page.

I met a boy. We are complete opposites in almost every way. He is salty hair, rum drinking, trance listening, beach loving Aussie, and I’m a forest loving, cold weather, whiskey drinking, bluegrass listening American girl.

The only thing we can seem to agree on is that life is not meant to be wasted, and we both want to live it the best we can. And that breakfast is the best meal of the day. He is fantastic and makes me feel out of this world happy. I feel like I cannot stop smiling. 

So when I first started thinking I was ready to date I disclosed 5 fears to my small blog followers of the world. I’m now going to tell you why they no longer bother me.

1. I felt like any guy I met wouldn’t know the real me. However, any guy who is interested in me in any capacity is going to know the real me. He will know I drink whiskey, love beer, am a huge bluegrass music fan, and that I would wake up in the middle of the night to check the packer score. It’s simply not possible to know me and not know these things. Sure he won’t get to see me dance my ass off at a bluegrass concert, but you have to take what you can get and make the most of it.
2. Oh yes, The fear of the future. When you are living abroad it is highly unlikely you will meet someone who already has their future figured out. As long as you are both open to discussion, changes, and maybe some sacrifices along the way you can figure it out. Dreams are mergeable, in most cases, and best of all you get to create new ones together. Isn’t that what relationships are all about?
3. I don’t remember how to make a relationship work. What does it matter? Any relationship I have certainly isn’t going to be the same as any of the ones of the past. Honesty and communication is all you need. Honestly communicate with me about what you want and we will work it out. Be real about who you are and I’ll be real back.
4. Cultural differences. Ah, yes. This one is still a bit scary and tough for me, but ultimately it is currently what I’m loving the most. I’m learning so much! Australian words, foods, politics. This is part of why I’m living abroad, so that I can learn new things and explore these differences. I might get to explore a whole different side of the world with a guide who knows all about it.
5. Someone is bound to get hurt. This is a risk. My heart just got whole about a year ago. Do I want to risk breaking it again? You bet. What fun would life be without risks, and if the risks make you happier along the way, then all the more reason to do it!

So I’m diving in, head first. There brain. Now please, go enjoy your vacation.